(Normally I’d just call this “random updates” but all the political crap being posted on FB about the US
I saw Craig with a K outside work again on Friday, stood outside futzing with his cell for a few minutes. On the upside he hasn’t darkened my door again.
I have indeed gained 10 pounds over the last little while, and it ain’t muscle Forrest. So I’m seriously getting serious about the gym and my health again. The gym is mandatory unless I’m having a really awful day. It does make me feel a bit better that C told me she’s gained weight too, I mean if the Goddess Divine of the gym and personal training can gain unwanted pounds then it’s reasonable I would too. (‘Tho in her case I don’t know where those pounds are hiding?...possibly her toes are enormously fat?)
So starting today I’m getting back on track, did the morning lower body class and ran 3k, also coming up with meal ideas, ‘tho I still hate the idea of cooking for one.
Dr Asshat still hasn’t gotten back to me with a referral and every time I’ve phoned the line is busy or nobody answer’s the phone, and they don’t have an answering machine. A friend mentioned she has the name of a GP accepting new patients so I’m following up with that.
For grief counseling I’m going to be phoning therapists directly, explain my situation (incl. Dr Asshat) and seeing how we can work it from that end.
Oh, and I still haven’t tried the sleeping pills.
I’m also back to making lists. I had stopped for awhile thinking I didn’t really need them, but I do. And I’m not talking grocery lists, I’ve always needed them, I’m talking about what I need to get done lists. They keep me going forward instead of just drifting, the difference between being active and pro-active with my new life.
The list this week:
- Figure out grief therapy
- Book plane ticket out of here for Christmas
- Follow up on GP referral
- Get old dressers and bookcases out of here
- Phone HIS Mom back. (She left a depressing message last week and I just couldn’t deal with it, and still don’t want to.)
- Seriously start looking into going back to school.
- Talk to R (friend and accountant) and figure out a game plan for contacting Revenue Canada
The above is along with every day stuff, work, ride, gym, tap, and the general idea that I should do some house cleaning. Plus spending time with friends that I feel I’ve been missing either via e-mail or face to face.
‘Tho all the above will have to wait until tomorrow. I’m working a split today with my idiot co-worker who’s morphed into a miserable, sour bitch. I’ve seen it before but now that I’m regularly working 2 shifts with her a week (without our manager around) she’s just become miserable towards me. I can’t figure out if she’s just really good at faking happy/polite with costumers/kitchen staff and can’t be to do so with me or if she’s intentionally being a bitch to me. Either way, that shit needs to stop. If HE where still alive I’d blow it off or figure out how to manager her, or just be a bitch right back, but I honestly don’t have it in me right now.
So, feeling slightly like a 12 year old running to mommy to tattle, I’ll be talking to my manager about it. I did talk to her about it a bit awhile ago but all she did was talk to both of us about how we’re co-workers and need to at least be polite to each other, since then things have escalated and I’m pretty much fed up. What I really want to do is grab her around the neck, throw her against the wall and growl at her to knock it the fuck off.
I honestly hate that she’s able to upset me, ‘tho I guess I upset pretty easy these days. What’s worse is I’ve got enough to deal with, I don’t need the dread of “fuck, I’m working with her today” first thing in the morning. I mean I’m waitressing for Christ’s sakes; it’s not like a high-pressure, competitive job where the pay cheque’s big enough to make up for toxic co-workers.
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